A daily roundup of things that seemed important.
Fritz is the opiate of the masses
IT’S POOR MOJO’S NEWS SHOW! FOR WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY SEVENTH, TWO THOUSAND AND SEVEN
A DAILY ROUNDUP OF THINGS THAT SEEMED IMPORTANT .
http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/n/a/2007/02/05/national/a185738S04.DTL
TODAY'S TOP STORY IS THIS SAD, MENTALLY ILL MOTHER OF THREE IN FLORIDA WHO HAS ENTERTAINED US ENDLESSLY ALL DAY AND WHO STANDS CHARGED WITH ATTEMPTED MURDER. WHY IS IT EITHER GERMANY OR FLORIDA? ADAM COROLLA WAS RIGHT. ANYWAY, THE STORY HAS BEEN BEATEN TO DEATH, SO I THOUGHT I'D JUST TURN THE BEST PARTS INTO FREE VERSE AND LET YOU FILL IN THE REST.
police said Nowak drove 900 miles
wearing diapers in the car
(Astronauts wear diapers during launch and re-entry)
dressed in a wig and a trench coat
asked for a ride
Started crying
then sprayed a chemical into Shipman's car
a steel mallet, a 4-inch folding knife, rubber tubing, $600 and garbage bags
PHYSICISTS ARE USING A LARGE HARD-ON COLLIDER TO TEST STRING THEORY. NO, ACTUALLY, IT'S THE LARGE HADRON COLLIDER, A NEW ATOM SMASHER NOW BEING BUILT IN EUROPE, BUT THAT ISN'T FUNNY AT ALL. POOR MOJO'S NEWSWIRE EDITOR MOJO ACTUALLY THOUGHT (WHEN HE SAW IT ON PORTAL OF EVIL NEWS) THAT THE STORY WAS ABOUT A COLLIDER OF LARGE HARD-ONS, BUT ADMITTED THAT THAT IS A DIFFERENT BRANCH OF SCIENCE ENTIRELY. AS FOR STRING THEORY, THE NEW SCIENCE DAILY ARTICLE SAYS String theory contends the fundamental forces and matter of nature can be reduced to tiny one-dimensional filaments called strings. SAY, THAT CLEARED EVERYTHING UP.
THIS IS POOR MOJO'S NEWS SHOW!
http://www.jacksonville.com/tu-online/stories/012707/neS_7573963.shtml
THE U-S NAVY SAYS, FUCK WHALES. NO, NOT THE TINY COUNTRY IN GREAT BRITIAN, THE INTELLIGENT SEA MAMMALS WE HUMANS JUST CAN'T KILL FAST ENOUGH. MOJO HAS THE UPDATE ON MID-RANGE SONAR:
The last time they tested this, several years ago, it deafened whales for hundreds of miles around. The sonar was so loud that it destroyed their eardrums and they beached themselves in panic trying to escape the now-treacherous sea.
Our own Giant Squid commented upon this when it happened last time. SO, GO CHECK OUT OUR NEWSWIRE AND HIT THAT LINK.
WHAT'S THE NAVY'S JUSTIFICATION FOR THIS HORSESHIT? FROM JACKSONVILLE DOT COM: Secretary of the Navy Gordon England said Tuesday that he was tapping a national defense exemption from the Marine Mammal Protection Act that will allow mid-frequency active sonar use during major training exercises. Congress included the exemption in the National Defense Authorization Act of 2004.
The Natural Resources Defense Council's senior attorney, Joel Reynolds, said the council is dismayed with the Navy's announcement but still plans to "vigorously pursue the pending lawsuit." THAT HAD FORCED THE NAVY TO STOP TESTING THE SONAR.
The suit says the studies show mid-range sonar can cause a range of harmful effects, including death from damage to organ tissue and hemorrhaging of air cavities; beaching of animals; loss of hearing; abandonment of habitat; disruption of mating, feeding, nursing, and migrating; aggressive behavior and other problems.
Biologists are concerned that "whales found dying on beaches are only the tip of an iceberg and that many more are dying at sea," the suit said.
http://thinkprogress.org/2007/02/06/white-house-lawyers-up/
WHAT DO YA DO WHEN YOU'RE PRETTY SURE YOU'RE GOING TO BE CALLED OUT FOR YOUR CRIMINAL ACTIVITIES? LOOK UP GOOD LAWYER, NATCH! THINK PROGRESS SAYS THAT'S WHAT THE BUSH ADMINISTRATION IS UP TO, FROM THE ARTICLE, QUOTING AN ABC NEWS BLOG: “A line item buried in the president’s budget reveals the Bush administration is gearing up for emboldened legal challenges from Gitmo detainees. A brief paragraph in President Bush’s 2008 budget request shows he plans to hire nearly two dozen new Justice Department lawyers to fight suits brought by Guantanamo detainees challenging their imprisonment.”
http://www.nytimes.com/2007/02/05/washington/05real.html?_r=1&ref=washington&oref=slogin
States to Feds on Unfunded Standardized ID Card Mandate: Go Shit In Your Hat - IF YOU HAVEN'T HEARD ABOUT THE REAL I-D ACT, JUST THINK HOW MUCH YOU'LL ENJOY PAYING $100 OR MORE FOR A DRIVER'S LICENSE AFTER 2008. THE FEDERAL ACT FORCES STATES TO STANDARDIZE STATE I-D CARDS AND AMOUNTS TO AN UN-FUNDED MANDATE COSTING FOR EXAMPLE, A LIGHTLY POPULATED STATE LIKE MAINE MORE THAN $185 million, ACCORDING TO A NEW YORK TIMES ARTICLE. IF CASH-STRAPPED STATES CAN'T GET THE FEDERAL GOVERNMENT TO COVER THE COSTS, THEN GUESS WHO WILL? FROM THE ARTICLE: Maine legislators started off the rebellion late last month by passing a nonbinding resolution that rejected the REAL ID LAW...They said that Instead of making Maine’s residents more secure, it would leave them more vulnerable to identity theft.
Since then, legislatures in five states — Georgia, Montana, New Mexico, Washington and Wyoming — have voted in committee or on the floor of one chamber to move similar legislation ahead. The bill adopted in a 99-to-1 vote by the Montana House of Representatives would go furthest, ordering state officials there to ignore the federal law.
Unless the federal law is revised, any state that defies it will risk causing major inconvenience for its residents, as noncompliant licenses will not be accepted as a proof of identification at airports, federal buildings or when applying for federal benefits.
WE'LL BE BACK AFTER THIS SHORT MESSAGE FROM GAMER'S LEDGE
Cooperatively sponsored by:
Gamersledge Podcast is a daily video-game podcast that airs Tuesday thru Friday. It is hardcore-oriented, but that doesn't mean we won't be all-inclusive for casual gamers. We cover the latest news, rumors and review games for the big three! Web site: Gamersledge
THIS IS POOR MOJO'S NEWS SHOW!
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/6328873.stm
BBC NEWS SAYS 340,000 ARE homesless after massive floods in Jakarta... At least 20 people have been killed
Three days of torrential rain have caused INDONESIAN rivers to burst their banks, sending muddy water up to 3m (10ft) deep into homes and businesses.
Authorities say the city of nine million people is now on its highest level of alert.
http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2007/02/06/MNGLKNVAQN1.DTL
Senate Republicans on Monday blocked debate on the Iraq war, stymieing efforts by Democrats to send even a weak bipartisan message opposing President Bush's order of 21,500 more troops into an intensifying civil war in Baghdad and Anbar province, ACCORDING TO S-F GATE DOT COM.
Senate Republican leaders pressured their most vocal anti-war critics into a test of party loyalty, using a procedural vote to save the administration a major embarrassment and stall Democratic plans to ratchet up pressure on the White House to begin pulling back from Iraq. The move also saved wavering Republicans from casting a difficult vote revealing their stand on the war.
THE HOLLYWOOD LIBERAL BLOG QUOTES THE NEWS BLOG'S LIST OF EIGHTEEN REPUBLICAN SENATORS WHO WOULD DEARLY LOVE TO VOTE IN SOME WAY AGAINST EXPANDING THE IRAQ WAR...THEY'RE ALL UP FOR RE-ELECTION, AND THEIR ELECTORATES HATE THE WAR. TOO BAD. SPINELESS SENATORS CHUCK HAGEL OF NEBRASKA AND JOHN SUNUNU OF NEW HAMPSHIRE ARE SINGLED OUT FOR TALKING SHIT ABOUT VOTING AGAINST THE WAR, RIGHT UP UNTIL THEY -- ONCE AGAIN -- ESSENTIALLY VOTED TO EXPAND IT.
http://people.monstersandcritics.com/news/article_1256754.php/Rev._Ted_Haggard_cured_from_being_gay
Monsters and Crtiics ASKS...Who is Ted Haggard? Remember the disgraced preacher who liked to snort meth off the buttocks of a gay hooker? That Ted Haggard. HE SAYS HE'S NOT GAY ANYMORE. AND I GOT A BRIDGE IN BROOKLYN I CAN LET YOU HAVE CHEAP.
FROM THE ARTICLE: Haggard, 50, resigned as president of the National Association of Evangelicals and was fired from the church he built from nothing into a 14,000-member congregation after a former male prostitute in Denver alleged a three-year cash-for-sex relationship....Now the Rev. Ted Haggard has emerged from three weeks of intensive counseling convinced he is "completely heterosexual".
I can't wait until he gets caught blowing a choad.
http://www.iht.com/articles/2007/02/04/america/web.0204contract.php
CONTRACTORS HAVE BECOME THE FOURTH BRANCH OF GOVERNMENT. AMERICAN SAMIZDAT POINTS US TO AN INTERNATIONAL HERALD-TRIBUNE ARTICLE ABOUT HOW THE U-S GOVERNMENT USES MERCENARIES AND OTHER PRIVATE COMPANIES TO DO WHAT DIRECTLY ACCOUNTABLE GOVERNMENT EMPLOYEES USED TO DO. FROM THE ARTICLE... In June, short of people to process cases of incompetence and fraud by federal contractors, officials at the General Services Administration responded with what has become the government's reflexive answer to almost every problem.
They hired another contractor.
It did not matter that the company they chose, CACI International, had itself recently avoided a suspension from federal contracting; or that the work, delving into investigative files on other contractors, appeared to pose a conflict of interest; or that each person supplied by the company would cost taxpayers $104 an hour.
Without a public debate or formal policy decision, contractors have become a virtual fourth branch of government. On the rise for decades, spending on federal contracts has soared during the Bush administration, to about $400 billion last year from $207 billion in 2000, fueled by the war in Iraq, domestic security and Hurricane Katrina, but also by a philosophy that encourages outsourcing almost everything government does.
## C L O S E R ##
OUR THEME SONG IS AN UNTITLED PIECE FROM THE DISC "HIMNO NASIONAL" BY THE FIGURES, AVAILABLE AT FINGERPRINT DASH RECORDS DOT COM.
FIND US ONLINE AT P-O-O-R-M-O-J-O DOT O-R-G, AND FOLLOW THE LINK TO THE NEWSWIRE
THIS HAS BEEN POOR MOJO'S NEWS SHOW, I'M ALAN BENARD.
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